October 1, 2011
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Love
Tonight as I was holding Layla in my arms, I looked down at her all snugged into her purple PJ’s, warm and sweet smelling, I thought of how each of my babies have brought me that heart swell of joy. How I have LOVED that they exist. And LOVED them, in all their round smushy cheeks that have such a pleasant give when you smother them in involuntary kisses, their happy gummy smiles, the soft fuzz of hair on their heads, the trusting warm weight of their little bodies as they rest against you, the roundness of their limbs, the smoothness of their skin, how they instinctively hold their breath when you cover their eyes, and whirl their little arms busily, and breathe huffy little busy breaths and look around with happy, excited eyes when you move your hand away. Makes me laugh every time. How their eyes predictably widen when you take them someplace dark, as if to let more light in that way. That makes me laugh too.
And so it is with Layla. I love her little warm hand resting on my neck, or clawing my chin inquisitively; the way she is happy to lean back on me and watch the world go by; how she splashes happily in her bath, how her tears fall down into her ears when she is laying on her back, how she busily sucks her tongue, how she is so happy to be with mommy, and how it makes all right with the world so many times. How she talks her talk, the loud “Aaaaaaahhhhhhhhh” that she loves to say. How she curls her toes and looks at you attentively when you rub lotion on her feet. How she grins and looks at me out of the corners of her eyes when I hug her into me when she is nursing. I love how she gets the joke.
I love her. I love them. In all of their stages and ways and troubles and joys.
So much.
Comments (2)
precious. there’s nothing like a mother’s love!
Have you, in the middle of enjoying one stage, said, “Oh, THIS is my favorite stage!” and then when they’re in the next stage you think, “No, THIS is my favorite stage”???? I did that for a long time! Until my daughter went into 5th grade. I did NOT like that stage, nor the very long one that followed. I do like the one she’s in now. { ; I also like the 2 different ones my boys are in now. But not really the one I’M in now!!!!